Dare:
Write out a renewal of my vows, and place them in my home.
Wow, this is the last day. Let's see, a renewal of my vows. I want this to be serious and thoughtful - so, another thing to pray about before I write. I have a long car trip, plenty of prayer time.
Results:
Oh shoot - such a busy day. I didn't have a chance to write anything. Count this as a temporary failure.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Day 39 - Love Dare - Love Endures
Dare:
Spend time in personal prayer, then write a letter of commitment and resolve to David. Inclue why I am committing to this marriage until death, and that I have purposed to love him no matter what. Leave it in a place for David to find it.
Ooh, I like writing. This sounds easy, but I want it to be sincere so I need to be praying for the right words.
Results:
Aren't the easy ones always the toughest. I was sick and didn't feel like doing anything. I got home from my all day training and was feeling sick so I went to bed. Didn't write. I can't promise I will today either, but I need to. I need to give up something and just do it. Maybe I can write during my lunch break today.
Spend time in personal prayer, then write a letter of commitment and resolve to David. Inclue why I am committing to this marriage until death, and that I have purposed to love him no matter what. Leave it in a place for David to find it.
Ooh, I like writing. This sounds easy, but I want it to be sincere so I need to be praying for the right words.
Results:
Aren't the easy ones always the toughest. I was sick and didn't feel like doing anything. I got home from my all day training and was feeling sick so I went to bed. Didn't write. I can't promise I will today either, but I need to. I need to give up something and just do it. Maybe I can write during my lunch break today.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Day 38 - Love Dare - Love Fulfills Dreams
Dare:
Ask myself what David would want if it was obtainable. Commit this to prayer and start mapping out a plan for meeting some (if not all) of his desires to whatever level I possibly can.
Just the other day David was talking about a trip he wanted to take in the Spring. I put him on a different path because I didn't want to go there. I was thinking it would be my vacation too, why should I go somewhere I didn't necessarily want to go when we had talked about so many other places before. I need to back up because it's obviously something he wants to do. So, okay, Ill start working towards that trip. In the meantime, there are lots of little things I can do. He likes it when I just sit with him or go with him for drives. That's easy stuff, but I usually grumble. No more grumbling. It's something David likes to do and I love him. I can give up time for him.
Results:
I have to confess - I was ready to throw everything I've learned the past 38 days out the door when I got home last night. I had laryngitis and was not feeling great anyway and found the dishes in the sink, kids toys everywhere, and everyone just sitting around. I walked in the bedroom to take off my shoes and David said there are a couple of cans of soup on the counter in the kitchen (meaning, heat up the soup and serve it). Normally I would have thought about getting the cans of soup and throwing them at David, but in reality I still would have heated them up and, grouchily, served David soup (not on his head as I would have liked). Instead, I went to the kitchen and did the dishes (I hate cooking anything when there are dirty dishes). Next I was planning to heat up the soup, but then David came in the kitchen and heated up some meat pies for us instead. So, even though I didn't have the best thoughts in my head last night, they weren't as bad as they used to be. I didn't make any snide comments and I didn't spend the night fuming quietly. The dishes were done and I had a nice warm meal.
Ask myself what David would want if it was obtainable. Commit this to prayer and start mapping out a plan for meeting some (if not all) of his desires to whatever level I possibly can.
Just the other day David was talking about a trip he wanted to take in the Spring. I put him on a different path because I didn't want to go there. I was thinking it would be my vacation too, why should I go somewhere I didn't necessarily want to go when we had talked about so many other places before. I need to back up because it's obviously something he wants to do. So, okay, Ill start working towards that trip. In the meantime, there are lots of little things I can do. He likes it when I just sit with him or go with him for drives. That's easy stuff, but I usually grumble. No more grumbling. It's something David likes to do and I love him. I can give up time for him.
Results:
I have to confess - I was ready to throw everything I've learned the past 38 days out the door when I got home last night. I had laryngitis and was not feeling great anyway and found the dishes in the sink, kids toys everywhere, and everyone just sitting around. I walked in the bedroom to take off my shoes and David said there are a couple of cans of soup on the counter in the kitchen (meaning, heat up the soup and serve it). Normally I would have thought about getting the cans of soup and throwing them at David, but in reality I still would have heated them up and, grouchily, served David soup (not on his head as I would have liked). Instead, I went to the kitchen and did the dishes (I hate cooking anything when there are dirty dishes). Next I was planning to heat up the soup, but then David came in the kitchen and heated up some meat pies for us instead. So, even though I didn't have the best thoughts in my head last night, they weren't as bad as they used to be. I didn't make any snide comments and I didn't spend the night fuming quietly. The dishes were done and I had a nice warm meal.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Day 37 - Love Dare - Love Agrees in Prayer
Dare:
Ask David if we can begin praying together. Talk about the best time to do this. Use this time to commit your concerns, disagreements, and needs before the Lord. Don't forget to thank Him for His provision and blessing.
Hey, this one's already set. We are going to use the time we read the Bible as a prayer time also.
Results:
Nothing to add. We had decided to start after I got back from my business trip, but now I'm not going overnight - just too really long day trips. But, now I have laryngitis - can't get a word out of my throat. Have to wait for tht to clear up.
Ask David if we can begin praying together. Talk about the best time to do this. Use this time to commit your concerns, disagreements, and needs before the Lord. Don't forget to thank Him for His provision and blessing.
Hey, this one's already set. We are going to use the time we read the Bible as a prayer time also.
Results:
Nothing to add. We had decided to start after I got back from my business trip, but now I'm not going overnight - just too really long day trips. But, now I have laryngitis - can't get a word out of my throat. Have to wait for tht to clear up.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Day 26 - Love Dare - Love is God's Word
Dare:
Commit to reading the Bible every day. Find a devotional book or other resource that will give me some guidance. If David is open to it, see if he will commit to daily Bible reading with me. Begin submitting each area of my life to its guidance and start building on the rock.
I would love to spend some time reading the Bible with David every day. I'll ask him is he would like to do it. It would have to be at night because we get up so early. If not, I will have to pick it up and do it myself. I was reading the Bible through in a year and then hit July and stopped. I don't know why. Halfway through - why couldn't I keep it up?
Results:
I talked to David about reading the Bible together and he's all for it. We agreed we'd have to set aside time in the evening since we both have such an early start in the morning already. It will have to wait for a couple of days though because I have to leave on a business trip. But, as soon as I'm back - we're starting. By the way, I also threw in praying together during that time.
Commit to reading the Bible every day. Find a devotional book or other resource that will give me some guidance. If David is open to it, see if he will commit to daily Bible reading with me. Begin submitting each area of my life to its guidance and start building on the rock.
I would love to spend some time reading the Bible with David every day. I'll ask him is he would like to do it. It would have to be at night because we get up so early. If not, I will have to pick it up and do it myself. I was reading the Bible through in a year and then hit July and stopped. I don't know why. Halfway through - why couldn't I keep it up?
Results:
I talked to David about reading the Bible together and he's all for it. We agreed we'd have to set aside time in the evening since we both have such an early start in the morning already. It will have to wait for a couple of days though because I have to leave on a business trip. But, as soon as I'm back - we're starting. By the way, I also threw in praying together during that time.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Day 35 - Love Dare - Love is Accountable
Dare:
Find a marriage mentor - someone who is a strong Christian and who will be honest and loving with me. If I feel that counseling is needed, then take the first step to set up an appontment. During this process, ask God to direct my decisions and discernment.
Well, this is honestly tough for me. I have no problem telling others what I do that's wrong, but I hate to say anything to anyone else about David. Early in our marriage David used to tell his mom about me and it really tainted our relationship and created some big problems I don't ever want to be the cause of any relationship problems for David. So, it's tough. I've spent my life keeping it in. Not that there is much to complain about as far as David is concerned. But is this about that? No, I guess it's not. Accountability would be about what I'm doing, not David.
So, now the issue for me is, I've always had a hard time talking to people about my problems. I honestly don't think they want to hear it. I've also always had lots of friends who tend to be talkers and dominate the conversations (not the best friends I've ever had). I do have a couple of friends that honestly listen to me without interrupting me to tell me about their situation. Their marriages aren't necessarily stronger than mine but I think I would have a hard time finding someone whose marriage is stronger that I could talk to. Okay, I'll pray about this for the right person.
Result:
No results yet - gotta get more serious about my praying. There are so many distractions that pull my time away. Prayer has got to be more of a priority. I will be seeing a lot of godly people today - I pray God points out the right person to me.
Find a marriage mentor - someone who is a strong Christian and who will be honest and loving with me. If I feel that counseling is needed, then take the first step to set up an appontment. During this process, ask God to direct my decisions and discernment.
Well, this is honestly tough for me. I have no problem telling others what I do that's wrong, but I hate to say anything to anyone else about David. Early in our marriage David used to tell his mom about me and it really tainted our relationship and created some big problems I don't ever want to be the cause of any relationship problems for David. So, it's tough. I've spent my life keeping it in. Not that there is much to complain about as far as David is concerned. But is this about that? No, I guess it's not. Accountability would be about what I'm doing, not David.
So, now the issue for me is, I've always had a hard time talking to people about my problems. I honestly don't think they want to hear it. I've also always had lots of friends who tend to be talkers and dominate the conversations (not the best friends I've ever had). I do have a couple of friends that honestly listen to me without interrupting me to tell me about their situation. Their marriages aren't necessarily stronger than mine but I think I would have a hard time finding someone whose marriage is stronger that I could talk to. Okay, I'll pray about this for the right person.
Result:
No results yet - gotta get more serious about my praying. There are so many distractions that pull my time away. Prayer has got to be more of a priority. I will be seeing a lot of godly people today - I pray God points out the right person to me.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Day 34 - Love Dare - Love Celebrates Godliness
Dare:
Find a specific, recent example when David demonstrated Christian character in a noticeable way. Verbally commend him for this at some point today.
Oh darn. I did this yesterday. I could have saved it for today and been done with this dare. In truth, there is so much to commend David about. He truly tries to live a life that is honoring to Christ. He has such a strong gift of mercy. For example, the thing I commended him for yesterday involved his role as AWANA Commander, a Christian children's club that focuses on Bible memorization done through our church. The club has a "store" every once in a while where the kids can spend their AWANA bucks that they earn for memorizing verses, outstanding behavior, bringing their Bible and things like that.
Anyway, there are some kids that are just poor. Their parents would never be able buy much since they are probably concentrating on things like paying their rent and buying food. Sometimes these kids may not have earned enough bucks to buy something they really want so David will let them buy it for whatever they have. He had one boy that had 20 AWANA bucks and wanted something that was 75 bucks. David let him have it to the consternation of some of his AWANA store helpers, who have the gift of administration and prophecy. They thought David should be helping the kids learn the value of money while David wants to teach them grace. It all goes back to when he was a poor kid. He remembers people that reached out to him and gave him things he didn't deserve. That made such an impact on his life. He wants kids to experience the same thing.
See, isn't he wonderful? I have the gift of administration but I have learned to understand David's motivation and truly support how he handles these situations and think it is what Jesus would do in the same situation. When David told me about this, I told him how much I admired him and what he did. He said he wonders what people think when they see him. I think they see someone that loves God and lives a life that honors God.
So, it will be so easy to find something to praise in him today.
Result:
As I said, David is so easy to praise. I'm starting to try to put this all together. I have six more days. On the 7th day I want to tie this together - what changes have occurred, that kind of stuff. So, I'm doing some deep thinking here - don't disturb me.
Find a specific, recent example when David demonstrated Christian character in a noticeable way. Verbally commend him for this at some point today.
Oh darn. I did this yesterday. I could have saved it for today and been done with this dare. In truth, there is so much to commend David about. He truly tries to live a life that is honoring to Christ. He has such a strong gift of mercy. For example, the thing I commended him for yesterday involved his role as AWANA Commander, a Christian children's club that focuses on Bible memorization done through our church. The club has a "store" every once in a while where the kids can spend their AWANA bucks that they earn for memorizing verses, outstanding behavior, bringing their Bible and things like that.
Anyway, there are some kids that are just poor. Their parents would never be able buy much since they are probably concentrating on things like paying their rent and buying food. Sometimes these kids may not have earned enough bucks to buy something they really want so David will let them buy it for whatever they have. He had one boy that had 20 AWANA bucks and wanted something that was 75 bucks. David let him have it to the consternation of some of his AWANA store helpers, who have the gift of administration and prophecy. They thought David should be helping the kids learn the value of money while David wants to teach them grace. It all goes back to when he was a poor kid. He remembers people that reached out to him and gave him things he didn't deserve. That made such an impact on his life. He wants kids to experience the same thing.
See, isn't he wonderful? I have the gift of administration but I have learned to understand David's motivation and truly support how he handles these situations and think it is what Jesus would do in the same situation. When David told me about this, I told him how much I admired him and what he did. He said he wonders what people think when they see him. I think they see someone that loves God and lives a life that honors God.
So, it will be so easy to find something to praise in him today.
Result:
As I said, David is so easy to praise. I'm starting to try to put this all together. I have six more days. On the 7th day I want to tie this together - what changes have occurred, that kind of stuff. So, I'm doing some deep thinking here - don't disturb me.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Day 33 - Love Dare - Love Completes Each Other
Dare:
Recognize that David is integral to our future success. Let him know today that I want to include him in my upcoming decisions, and that I need his perspective and counsel. If I've ignored his input in the past, admit my oversight and ask him to forgive me.
Okay, so most of the time I include David on decision making, but not always. I try to let him know what's going on, but do I seek his insight? Not always. Today is a good chance because I need to think about things to do while my mom is visiting. I'll ask him what he thinks. Start there.
Result:
I asked David to pick me up at work and we drove for a while and then stopped for dinner. It was nice to just spend time with him and talk. I don't know if we were making any decisions, but just talking. And don't decisions come out of knowing your partner better and what he thinks about issues? It was a good night.
Recognize that David is integral to our future success. Let him know today that I want to include him in my upcoming decisions, and that I need his perspective and counsel. If I've ignored his input in the past, admit my oversight and ask him to forgive me.
Okay, so most of the time I include David on decision making, but not always. I try to let him know what's going on, but do I seek his insight? Not always. Today is a good chance because I need to think about things to do while my mom is visiting. I'll ask him what he thinks. Start there.
Result:
I asked David to pick me up at work and we drove for a while and then stopped for dinner. It was nice to just spend time with him and talk. I don't know if we were making any decisions, but just talking. And don't decisions come out of knowing your partner better and what he thinks about issues? It was a good night.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Day 32 - Love Dare - Love Meets Sexual Needs
Dare:
If at all possible, try to initiate sex with David today. Do this in a way that honors what David has told me abouth what he needs from me sexually. Ask God to make this enjoyable for both of us as well as a path to greater intimacy.
Well, this is not a subject I want to blog about - and I know my kids definitely don't want to hear about. I knew some dare like this would be thrown in here. I can see why it was put in so late in the list. This one will be kind of tough so, of course, another item of prayer.
Results:
All I have to say is, it's none of your business.
If at all possible, try to initiate sex with David today. Do this in a way that honors what David has told me abouth what he needs from me sexually. Ask God to make this enjoyable for both of us as well as a path to greater intimacy.
Well, this is not a subject I want to blog about - and I know my kids definitely don't want to hear about. I knew some dare like this would be thrown in here. I can see why it was put in so late in the list. This one will be kind of tough so, of course, another item of prayer.
Results:
All I have to say is, it's none of your business.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Day 31 - Love Dare - Love and Marriage
Dare:
Is there a "leaving" issue I haven't been brave enough to conquer yet? Confess it to David today and resolve to make it right.
I wish I had a "leaving" issue. I haven't lived near my parents since we got married. I'm lucky if I get to see them once a year. I'm terrible about phone calls and letters, not that I don't think of them often. So, I wonder if the "leaving" issue for me went way too far the other way because there are times I resent always having to live near David's family at the sacrifice of contact with mine (who, by the way, we rarely see now - David's family). Hmmm, not that's an issue for me to work on.
Results:
I'm ashamed to say I didn't pray much about this today. Thought I was too busy, but when I think about my day, I had plenty of opportunity. I really need to get serious about the prayer thing. How can I hope to accomplish much without prayer? Hey, I have an idea. Anyone that reads this, you pray for me that I will pray. That would be a whole lot of prayer.
Is there a "leaving" issue I haven't been brave enough to conquer yet? Confess it to David today and resolve to make it right.
I wish I had a "leaving" issue. I haven't lived near my parents since we got married. I'm lucky if I get to see them once a year. I'm terrible about phone calls and letters, not that I don't think of them often. So, I wonder if the "leaving" issue for me went way too far the other way because there are times I resent always having to live near David's family at the sacrifice of contact with mine (who, by the way, we rarely see now - David's family). Hmmm, not that's an issue for me to work on.
Results:
I'm ashamed to say I didn't pray much about this today. Thought I was too busy, but when I think about my day, I had plenty of opportunity. I really need to get serious about the prayer thing. How can I hope to accomplish much without prayer? Hey, I have an idea. Anyone that reads this, you pray for me that I will pray. That would be a whole lot of prayer.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Day 30 - Love Dare - Love Brings Unity
Dare:
Isolate one area of division in my marriage, and look on today as a fresh opportunity to pray about it. Ask the Lord to reveal anything in my own heart that is threatening oneness with David. Pray the He would do the same for David. And if appropriate, discuss this matter openly, seeking God for unity.
Okay, the instructions are to pray and I will need to because I'm not aware of anything that is dividing our marriage. If there is anything, please God, show me and show David. I will be observant for your answer.
Result:
Still praying - God hasn't revealed anything to me yet, or I'm just too pigheaded to see it.
Isolate one area of division in my marriage, and look on today as a fresh opportunity to pray about it. Ask the Lord to reveal anything in my own heart that is threatening oneness with David. Pray the He would do the same for David. And if appropriate, discuss this matter openly, seeking God for unity.
Okay, the instructions are to pray and I will need to because I'm not aware of anything that is dividing our marriage. If there is anything, please God, show me and show David. I will be observant for your answer.
Result:
Still praying - God hasn't revealed anything to me yet, or I'm just too pigheaded to see it.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Day 29 - Love Dare - Love's Motivation
Dare:
Before I see David again today, pray for him by name and his needs. Say "I love you," then express love to him in some tangile way. Go to God in prayer again, thanking Him for giving me the privilege of loving this one special person - unconditionally, the way He loves both of us.
I'm up before David, so I can pray for him and I can go in and say "I love you." Piece of cake. Now I have to think of some tangible way to show him I love him. Hmmmm, that's going to take some thinking. Get back to you on that one.
Result:
I did pray and went in and told David I loved him. He asked me why I was telling him. Hmmm, why did he ask that? I told him just because I love him. We used to do that all the time - just say "I love you" occasionally. Guess that just shows how much we've taken each other for granted. Anyway, he went to take and shower and I got his clothes out for him, something I never do. It felt good. I need to keep looking for little opportunities to do things for him. It also seems that David isn't as irritable as normal. He even said his back hurt a lot yesterday, something that always puts him in a bad mood. Yet, he wasn't. Because God is working on me, and I'm actually listening, He is helping me make things better for David. Wow, God is awesome.
Before I see David again today, pray for him by name and his needs. Say "I love you," then express love to him in some tangile way. Go to God in prayer again, thanking Him for giving me the privilege of loving this one special person - unconditionally, the way He loves both of us.
I'm up before David, so I can pray for him and I can go in and say "I love you." Piece of cake. Now I have to think of some tangible way to show him I love him. Hmmmm, that's going to take some thinking. Get back to you on that one.
Result:
I did pray and went in and told David I loved him. He asked me why I was telling him. Hmmm, why did he ask that? I told him just because I love him. We used to do that all the time - just say "I love you" occasionally. Guess that just shows how much we've taken each other for granted. Anyway, he went to take and shower and I got his clothes out for him, something I never do. It felt good. I need to keep looking for little opportunities to do things for him. It also seems that David isn't as irritable as normal. He even said his back hurt a lot yesterday, something that always puts him in a bad mood. Yet, he wasn't. Because God is working on me, and I'm actually listening, He is helping me make things better for David. Wow, God is awesome.
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Day 28 - Love Dare - Love Makes Sacrifices
Dare:
What is one of the greatest needs in David life right now? Is there a need I could lift from his shoulders today by a daring acto of sacrifice on my part? Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what I can to meet the need.
David seems to have starting a new Sunday School class on his mind. So, what can I do to help? I know he's concerned about curriculum. Maybe I could look that up for him.
Result:
Yes, I googled and found all sorts of information to David and went and presented it to him. I don't know if he even appreciated it, but I did it. I spent time I would have normally spent looking for stuff for me (or playing games) and did this for him. It was such a tiny sacrifice. It doesn't seem big enough. Did I hit the intention of the dare? I'm not sure I did. I'll keep working on this one too.
What is one of the greatest needs in David life right now? Is there a need I could lift from his shoulders today by a daring acto of sacrifice on my part? Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what I can to meet the need.
David seems to have starting a new Sunday School class on his mind. So, what can I do to help? I know he's concerned about curriculum. Maybe I could look that up for him.
Result:
Yes, I googled and found all sorts of information to David and went and presented it to him. I don't know if he even appreciated it, but I did it. I spent time I would have normally spent looking for stuff for me (or playing games) and did this for him. It was such a tiny sacrifice. It doesn't seem big enough. Did I hit the intention of the dare? I'm not sure I did. I'll keep working on this one too.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Day 27 - Love Dare - Love Encourages
Dare:
Eliminate the poison of unrealistic expectations in my home. Think of one area where David told me I'm expecting too much and tell him I'm sorry for being so hard on him about it. Promise him that I'll seek to understand, and assure him of my unconditional love.
Here's another area where I don't think I'm so bad, but then again, maybe I am. I have a habit of thinking through conversations we are going to have and writing the scripts in my head. Then when it doesn't go the way I expected, I pout and shut down. So I guess I'm expecting him to do things my way and it's obvious when it doesn't. Guess that's where I'll start.
Results:
Okay, nothing came up for this yesterday, but it will. I know it will because I do have these internal plots going on and there will be one that doesn't go my way. So, I will try to keep my mind and my eye open for when this comes up.
Eliminate the poison of unrealistic expectations in my home. Think of one area where David told me I'm expecting too much and tell him I'm sorry for being so hard on him about it. Promise him that I'll seek to understand, and assure him of my unconditional love.
Here's another area where I don't think I'm so bad, but then again, maybe I am. I have a habit of thinking through conversations we are going to have and writing the scripts in my head. Then when it doesn't go the way I expected, I pout and shut down. So I guess I'm expecting him to do things my way and it's obvious when it doesn't. Guess that's where I'll start.
Results:
Okay, nothing came up for this yesterday, but it will. I know it will because I do have these internal plots going on and there will be one that doesn't go my way. So, I will try to keep my mind and my eye open for when this comes up.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Day 26 - Love Dare - Love is Responsible
Dare:
Take time to pray through my areas of wrongdoing. Ask for God's forgiveness, then humble myself enough to admit them to David. Do it sincerely and truthfully. Ask David for forgiveness as well. No matter how he responds, make sure I cover my responsibility in love. Evein if they respond with criticism, accept it be receiving it as counsel.
Man, I knew it! As soon as I read about needing to forgive David, I knew it would be turned around to talk about things I need to be forgiven for. There are no BIG things but millions on millions of little things. My biggest problem is in my attitude. Asking God for forgiveness isn't tough, he already knows my faults, but asking David. Whoa, that's going to be tougher.
Results:
I honestly can't think of anything major, but is needing forgiveness kind of like sin? Is the little thing you need forgiveness the same as the big thing you need to be forgiven for? After all, sin is sin. Something you need to be forgiven for is sin, and it's all filth to God so let me rethink this for tomorrow.
Take time to pray through my areas of wrongdoing. Ask for God's forgiveness, then humble myself enough to admit them to David. Do it sincerely and truthfully. Ask David for forgiveness as well. No matter how he responds, make sure I cover my responsibility in love. Evein if they respond with criticism, accept it be receiving it as counsel.
Man, I knew it! As soon as I read about needing to forgive David, I knew it would be turned around to talk about things I need to be forgiven for. There are no BIG things but millions on millions of little things. My biggest problem is in my attitude. Asking God for forgiveness isn't tough, he already knows my faults, but asking David. Whoa, that's going to be tougher.
Results:
I honestly can't think of anything major, but is needing forgiveness kind of like sin? Is the little thing you need forgiveness the same as the big thing you need to be forgiven for? After all, sin is sin. Something you need to be forgiven for is sin, and it's all filth to God so let me rethink this for tomorrow.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Day 25 - Love Dare - Love Forgives
Dare:
Whatever you haven't forgiven in David, forgive it today. Let it go. Say from my heart, "I choose to forgive."
There are things I think about in the past, but have I not forgiven David for them? It's not that I dwell on them. The thought of these things only comes up once in a long, long while, not even once a year. What feelings do they create in me when they come up? I don't hold them over David's head. They happened so long ago, almost a different lifetime. Yet, I still harbor bad feelings about them. I don't think I ever actually forgave David for them, just kind of brushed them under a rug. I guess it's time to really say from my heart, I choose to forgive these things.
Results:
It was such a busy, busy day that I didn't have time to even think about forgiveness. That also means I didn't think about anything that David needed forgiveness about. Well, my weekend starts tonight (I'm off on Fridays) and I need to take time to pray and really concentrate on forgiving David. SOme of it just seems so silly, because this stuff was all 30 years ago. I really don't think about it. But I guess it's there in the background, so it needs to be done.
Whatever you haven't forgiven in David, forgive it today. Let it go. Say from my heart, "I choose to forgive."
There are things I think about in the past, but have I not forgiven David for them? It's not that I dwell on them. The thought of these things only comes up once in a long, long while, not even once a year. What feelings do they create in me when they come up? I don't hold them over David's head. They happened so long ago, almost a different lifetime. Yet, I still harbor bad feelings about them. I don't think I ever actually forgave David for them, just kind of brushed them under a rug. I guess it's time to really say from my heart, I choose to forgive these things.
Results:
It was such a busy, busy day that I didn't have time to even think about forgiveness. That also means I didn't think about anything that David needed forgiveness about. Well, my weekend starts tonight (I'm off on Fridays) and I need to take time to pray and really concentrate on forgiving David. SOme of it just seems so silly, because this stuff was all 30 years ago. I really don't think about it. But I guess it's there in the background, so it needs to be done.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Day 24 - Love Dare - Love vs. Lust
Dare:
End it now. Identify every object of lust in my life and remove it. Single out every lie I've swallowed in pursuing forbidden pleasure and reject it.
I read today's title and immediately thought of, well, you know what the word lust conjures up. At first I thought, okay, not a problem, but, whoa, this is a big thing. I know I lust for things. When I'm depressed I want to spend money. It's an automatic reaction. I'm going to spend some time really praying for God to reveal to me the other things I lust so I can reject them.
Results:
God has the best sense of humor ever. Yesterday I wrote that I'm giving up Bejeweled Blitz because it occupies too much of my time. Well yesterday I was notified that I received 1,000,000 points in the weekly drawing. Points can be used to buy bonuses during the game and, yes, it's a whopping amount of points. Now these points are going to sit there wasted, always tempting me. Hmmm, maybe it was Satan that arranged for the points. Either way, I am determined that I will keep that dare and not go near Bejeweled Blitz.
I'm continuing to pray about things I lust after. This will probably be an ongoing thing. I'm going to pray that God continues to reveal to me when something I'm thinking about or am about to do is to satisfy my lust and to help direct back to my true love, my husband.
End it now. Identify every object of lust in my life and remove it. Single out every lie I've swallowed in pursuing forbidden pleasure and reject it.
I read today's title and immediately thought of, well, you know what the word lust conjures up. At first I thought, okay, not a problem, but, whoa, this is a big thing. I know I lust for things. When I'm depressed I want to spend money. It's an automatic reaction. I'm going to spend some time really praying for God to reveal to me the other things I lust so I can reject them.
Results:
God has the best sense of humor ever. Yesterday I wrote that I'm giving up Bejeweled Blitz because it occupies too much of my time. Well yesterday I was notified that I received 1,000,000 points in the weekly drawing. Points can be used to buy bonuses during the game and, yes, it's a whopping amount of points. Now these points are going to sit there wasted, always tempting me. Hmmm, maybe it was Satan that arranged for the points. Either way, I am determined that I will keep that dare and not go near Bejeweled Blitz.
I'm continuing to pray about things I lust after. This will probably be an ongoing thing. I'm going to pray that God continues to reveal to me when something I'm thinking about or am about to do is to satisfy my lust and to help direct back to my true love, my husband.
Day 23 - Love Dare - Love Always Protects
Dare:
Remove anything that is hindering our relationship, any addiction or influence that's stealing my affection and turning my heart away from David.
Well, one thing comes to mind immediately - BEJEWLED BLITZ has got to go. I am addicted to this game and will play it rather than spend time with David. One of my excuses is that it helps me kep my wits and makes me think. Well, baloney, it's just plain fun, but it steals time away from my relationship, so, goodnight sweet Bejewled Blitz, parting is such deep sorrow (it's not sweet, I'll miss it and plan on not coming back).
Result:
I so want to play Bejewled, but know I need to stay away. Successful so far. Pray for me, I'm an addict.
Remove anything that is hindering our relationship, any addiction or influence that's stealing my affection and turning my heart away from David.
Well, one thing comes to mind immediately - BEJEWLED BLITZ has got to go. I am addicted to this game and will play it rather than spend time with David. One of my excuses is that it helps me kep my wits and makes me think. Well, baloney, it's just plain fun, but it steals time away from my relationship, so, goodnight sweet Bejewled Blitz, parting is such deep sorrow (it's not sweet, I'll miss it and plan on not coming back).
Result:
I so want to play Bejewled, but know I need to stay away. Successful so far. Pray for me, I'm an addict.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Day 22 - Love Dare - Love is Faithful
Dare:
Choose today to be committed to love even if David has lost most of their interest in receiving it. Say to him today in words similar to there, "I love you. Period. I choose to love you even if you don't love me in return."
Wow, that sounds more like David to me than me to David. I don't always choose to show David the love he deserves, yet I am always aware of his love for me. I'll have to really look at this one and pray. I do need to tell David this.
Results:
Okay, so today we went up for Emmalee's birthday party in Victorville. That meant 1 1/2 - 2 hours in the car each way. That gave us lots of time to talk. I told David on the way home that I was going to tell him that when I look at other couples I just know how much I love him. But then that isn't really true. I love him because I love him. There is no comparing how I love him with how others love each other. He is my soul mate and God put us together. It cheapens my love to compare it to others. My love for David should only be measured against the love that God has for me.
Choose today to be committed to love even if David has lost most of their interest in receiving it. Say to him today in words similar to there, "I love you. Period. I choose to love you even if you don't love me in return."
Wow, that sounds more like David to me than me to David. I don't always choose to show David the love he deserves, yet I am always aware of his love for me. I'll have to really look at this one and pray. I do need to tell David this.
Results:
Okay, so today we went up for Emmalee's birthday party in Victorville. That meant 1 1/2 - 2 hours in the car each way. That gave us lots of time to talk. I told David on the way home that I was going to tell him that when I look at other couples I just know how much I love him. But then that isn't really true. I love him because I love him. There is no comparing how I love him with how others love each other. He is my soul mate and God put us together. It cheapens my love to compare it to others. My love for David should only be measured against the love that God has for me.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Day 21 - Love Dare - Love is Satisfied in God
Dare:
Be intentional today about making a time to pray and ready my Bible. As I do, immerse myself in the love and promises God has for me.
Sounds simple enough - I need to not just stick this time into an already busy day. I need to do it and stick my busy day around this.
Results:
Man, ended up taking a nap. The prayer part was not so hard because I just need me and God, but I didn't carry my Bible to the places I needed to go. I was so tired and we had activities to fill the rest of the day. I got my priorities wrong. FAIL!!!!!!!!!!!
Be intentional today about making a time to pray and ready my Bible. As I do, immerse myself in the love and promises God has for me.
Sounds simple enough - I need to not just stick this time into an already busy day. I need to do it and stick my busy day around this.
Results:
Man, ended up taking a nap. The prayer part was not so hard because I just need me and God, but I didn't carry my Bible to the places I needed to go. I was so tired and we had activities to fill the rest of the day. I got my priorities wrong. FAIL!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, October 1, 2010
Day 20 - Love Dare - Love is Jesus Christ
Dare:
Dare to take God a His Word. Dare to trust Jesus Christ for salvation.
I am saved by His Blood. I do try to stray at times, but He brings me right back. I am in His hands and He won't let me go. I need to remember His love for me and how He showed it with His sacrificed.
Wow, half-way through. What will the next 20 days bring? I hope I am reinforced in what is being developed.
Results:
Today was really rough, actually I should say tonight. The day was okay. Then we went with some friends to someone's birthday part, dinner and a movie. I am ashamed to say I said some things about David's driving and I shouldn't have. I'm ashamed.
At dinner time David started with the sarcastic, biting meanness. I don't think he realizes he does it, or maybe he does. I did as I normally do, just sit there and smile. But one of our friends did defend me. That's always the way it goes. I think I'm being the nice wife by not responding but my feelings are getting hurt. I really need to talk to David about how that makes me feel rather than just sit there and take it and get more hurt. I shouldn't be letting people defend me, plus when David does that, and I just sit there and take it, I think it makes him look bad and me look like the martyr. Not the way a marriage should be.
So, there it is. I've put it out there, now I need to do something about it.
Dare to take God a His Word. Dare to trust Jesus Christ for salvation.
I am saved by His Blood. I do try to stray at times, but He brings me right back. I am in His hands and He won't let me go. I need to remember His love for me and how He showed it with His sacrificed.
Wow, half-way through. What will the next 20 days bring? I hope I am reinforced in what is being developed.
Results:
Today was really rough, actually I should say tonight. The day was okay. Then we went with some friends to someone's birthday part, dinner and a movie. I am ashamed to say I said some things about David's driving and I shouldn't have. I'm ashamed.
At dinner time David started with the sarcastic, biting meanness. I don't think he realizes he does it, or maybe he does. I did as I normally do, just sit there and smile. But one of our friends did defend me. That's always the way it goes. I think I'm being the nice wife by not responding but my feelings are getting hurt. I really need to talk to David about how that makes me feel rather than just sit there and take it and get more hurt. I shouldn't be letting people defend me, plus when David does that, and I just sit there and take it, I think it makes him look bad and me look like the martyr. Not the way a marriage should be.
So, there it is. I've put it out there, now I need to do something about it.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Day 19 - Love Dare - Love is Impossible
Dare:
Look back over the dares from previous days. Were there some that seemed impossible to me? Have I realized my need for God to change my heart and to give me the ability to love? Ask Him to show me where I stand with Him and ask for the strength and grace to settle my eternal destination.
Well, I know where I stand and my eternal destination, but I have been attempting this dare thing on my own. It's worked fairly well, but I don't know if I could keep it up. Would I throw it all by the wayside the minute David becomes grouchy? In my strenght I would so I need to let God show His love through me. I need to give up control, not an easy thing for me. At first glance I thought, oh today is easy, but now I'm thinking I really, really need to pray and pray hard.
Results:
Not really anything to report, cause this is a heart changing thing. That doesn't always happen immediately but might be gradual. It takes practice 'cause hearts tend to follow the brain, which doesn't want to go back to what was comfortable. I will continue to pray, because this isn't something I can do on my own.
Look back over the dares from previous days. Were there some that seemed impossible to me? Have I realized my need for God to change my heart and to give me the ability to love? Ask Him to show me where I stand with Him and ask for the strength and grace to settle my eternal destination.
Well, I know where I stand and my eternal destination, but I have been attempting this dare thing on my own. It's worked fairly well, but I don't know if I could keep it up. Would I throw it all by the wayside the minute David becomes grouchy? In my strenght I would so I need to let God show His love through me. I need to give up control, not an easy thing for me. At first glance I thought, oh today is easy, but now I'm thinking I really, really need to pray and pray hard.
Results:
Not really anything to report, cause this is a heart changing thing. That doesn't always happen immediately but might be gradual. It takes practice 'cause hearts tend to follow the brain, which doesn't want to go back to what was comfortable. I will continue to pray, because this isn't something I can do on my own.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Day 18 - Love Dare - Love seeks to understand
Dare:
Prepare a special dinner at home, just for David and me. The dinner can be as nice as I want. Focus this time on getting to know David better, perhaps in areas we've rarely talked about. Determine to make it an enjoyable evening for us.
This definitely has to be delayed because it's AWANA night. David will be busy all night. Also, this might have to be a night out because we don't live by ourselves. Hard to have a special dinner with two little ones and their parents here too - and not fair. So, we may have to do this tomorrow. I want to do this, and do it right, so can't be tonight.
Results:
As I stated earlier, this was not the night for this dare. David gets to church early, I think about 4, and I get there at 6:30 and we don't get home until 9. But, I did make him a sandwich - only after he asked - so doesn't count at all. You know, I think I will save this one for Saturday so I can do it right. I want to do this right, not just half-way. So I'll catch this one up.
Prepare a special dinner at home, just for David and me. The dinner can be as nice as I want. Focus this time on getting to know David better, perhaps in areas we've rarely talked about. Determine to make it an enjoyable evening for us.
This definitely has to be delayed because it's AWANA night. David will be busy all night. Also, this might have to be a night out because we don't live by ourselves. Hard to have a special dinner with two little ones and their parents here too - and not fair. So, we may have to do this tomorrow. I want to do this, and do it right, so can't be tonight.
Results:
As I stated earlier, this was not the night for this dare. David gets to church early, I think about 4, and I get there at 6:30 and we don't get home until 9. But, I did make him a sandwich - only after he asked - so doesn't count at all. You know, I think I will save this one for Saturday so I can do it right. I want to do this right, not just half-way. So I'll catch this one up.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Day 17 - Love Dare - Love Promotes Intimacy
Dare:
Determine to guard David's secrest and to pray for them. Talk with David, and resolve to demonstrate love in spite of these issues. Really listen - make him feel safe.
Actually, this is the first one where I don't think this has been an issue. Guarding secrets - I don't talk about David's feelings or David's mistakes with anyone else. Those are intimate things between him and me. I've seen too many marriages where one of the spouses complains to someone else about their spouse and I determined I was never going to be like that. It does not good. I believe David feels safe because he does tell me how he feels about just about everything and he knows it won't go any farther. So, don't expect any big changes today.
Result:
As I thought, not a big change for me so I spent the day practicing some of the other things. When David said he needed to go to the store, did I want to go - I jumped up and put on my shoes. Not normal for me. We also stopped by Subway's for grinders and I did the ordering. It felt good to do this and didn't seem fake. I just need to keep practicing and it will become second nature.
Determine to guard David's secrest and to pray for them. Talk with David, and resolve to demonstrate love in spite of these issues. Really listen - make him feel safe.
Actually, this is the first one where I don't think this has been an issue. Guarding secrets - I don't talk about David's feelings or David's mistakes with anyone else. Those are intimate things between him and me. I've seen too many marriages where one of the spouses complains to someone else about their spouse and I determined I was never going to be like that. It does not good. I believe David feels safe because he does tell me how he feels about just about everything and he knows it won't go any farther. So, don't expect any big changes today.
Result:
As I thought, not a big change for me so I spent the day practicing some of the other things. When David said he needed to go to the store, did I want to go - I jumped up and put on my shoes. Not normal for me. We also stopped by Subway's for grinders and I did the ordering. It felt good to do this and didn't seem fake. I just need to keep practicing and it will become second nature.
Monday, September 27, 2010
Day 16 - Love Dare - Love Intercedes
Dare:
Pray for David's heart. Pray for 3 specific areas where I desire for God to work in David's life and in our marriage.
Wow, today's devotion mirrored what I blogged yesterday. I can't change David, and it's not my job to. God let's me know David's heart and his faults so I can lift him up in prayer. Now I need to find three specific areas that God points out to me. I don't want to pray selfishly here - that David would go buy me flowers or something life that. I want to pray for things that will make David a stronger man of God.
First I want to pray for the negative spirit that sometimes overcomes David. WHen he gets negative, he gets judgemental and that is wrong. When he sees something wrong, he needs to ask God what part he needs to take in the issue. It may be nothing - God may already be working on it. It may be talking to someone or it may be stepping in to help.
Secondly, I pray for his anger. He can be very quick to anger (although he is quick to get over it). Frequently this anger is unjustified, just a spur of the moment reaction. I pray he would stop and think about what he is angry about and how he should react.
Third, I pray for his health. He is overweight, obese really. He needs to get back on a serious weight loss regimen for his health. Actually, so do I. I've mentioned it before. I think God is telling me I need to suggest David and I go on a weight loss/exercise regimen together.
Okay, there's three. And they are things that will make David happier, make him a stronger man of God, and improve our marriage. Okay, now I need to pray.
Results:
I like praying for David. I know God heard my heart. Now I need to take action on the third item of prayer and help David. As far as the anger, something happened which set off his anger - it's really frustration. Let me just say electric bill and you'll probably understand. I need to take this to the Lord.
Pray for David's heart. Pray for 3 specific areas where I desire for God to work in David's life and in our marriage.
Wow, today's devotion mirrored what I blogged yesterday. I can't change David, and it's not my job to. God let's me know David's heart and his faults so I can lift him up in prayer. Now I need to find three specific areas that God points out to me. I don't want to pray selfishly here - that David would go buy me flowers or something life that. I want to pray for things that will make David a stronger man of God.
First I want to pray for the negative spirit that sometimes overcomes David. WHen he gets negative, he gets judgemental and that is wrong. When he sees something wrong, he needs to ask God what part he needs to take in the issue. It may be nothing - God may already be working on it. It may be talking to someone or it may be stepping in to help.
Secondly, I pray for his anger. He can be very quick to anger (although he is quick to get over it). Frequently this anger is unjustified, just a spur of the moment reaction. I pray he would stop and think about what he is angry about and how he should react.
Third, I pray for his health. He is overweight, obese really. He needs to get back on a serious weight loss regimen for his health. Actually, so do I. I've mentioned it before. I think God is telling me I need to suggest David and I go on a weight loss/exercise regimen together.
Okay, there's three. And they are things that will make David happier, make him a stronger man of God, and improve our marriage. Okay, now I need to pray.
Results:
I like praying for David. I know God heard my heart. Now I need to take action on the third item of prayer and help David. As far as the anger, something happened which set off his anger - it's really frustration. Let me just say electric bill and you'll probably understand. I need to take this to the Lord.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Day 15 - Love Dare - Love is Honorable
Dare:
Choose a way to honor and respect David in a way I don't normally.
I try to show honor to David. That is extremely important to David, but one thing hit me in the devotion for today. I don't always give him my full attention when he's talking to me, especially when I have a computer or my iPhone in front of me. I need to turn these off and look at him when he's talking to me. I think I always thought that I'm multi-tasking, but he probably views it as ignoring him. Okay, he comes before my computer.
Results:
Okay, it was hard, but I didn't do phone things in the car. I paid full attention to David. You know, I'm feeling a difference in our relationship. I don't feel like David is as irritated with me as he usually is. Things seem calmer. And I haven't changed him - I can't change him - I only have control over myself, so it must be me. I'm learning to control my reactions.
Choose a way to honor and respect David in a way I don't normally.
I try to show honor to David. That is extremely important to David, but one thing hit me in the devotion for today. I don't always give him my full attention when he's talking to me, especially when I have a computer or my iPhone in front of me. I need to turn these off and look at him when he's talking to me. I think I always thought that I'm multi-tasking, but he probably views it as ignoring him. Okay, he comes before my computer.
Results:
Okay, it was hard, but I didn't do phone things in the car. I paid full attention to David. You know, I'm feeling a difference in our relationship. I don't feel like David is as irritated with me as he usually is. Things seem calmer. And I haven't changed him - I can't change him - I only have control over myself, so it must be me. I'm learning to control my reactions.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Day 14 - Love Dare - Love Takes Delight
Dare:
Purposely neglect an activity I would normally do to spend time with David. Do something he wants to do. Just be together.
Well, as circumstances happen, we will be together today for a drive to give my grandson his birthday gift. It'll be an hour either way and then we'll probably go to a friend's house later. These are things we both want to do. But maybe in between, I won't play on the computer and I won't vegge in front of the TV. When he goes to bed, I'll go with him. I do enjoy being with David but I need to let him feel that.
Results:
I DID IT! I talked to David about fighting and I survived. We talked very civilly and talked about why I don't fight (my fear of confrontation). I even told David that I'm afraid of him. So, yea, task accomplished.
As far as yesterday's dare, as soon as I finished blogging I immediately went back to the bedroom and was just there with David. Normally I would have just sat at the computer and played games, not a very productive activity. David even asked what I was doing and I told him I wanted to be with him. It felt good. We were together absolutely all day.
Purposely neglect an activity I would normally do to spend time with David. Do something he wants to do. Just be together.
Well, as circumstances happen, we will be together today for a drive to give my grandson his birthday gift. It'll be an hour either way and then we'll probably go to a friend's house later. These are things we both want to do. But maybe in between, I won't play on the computer and I won't vegge in front of the TV. When he goes to bed, I'll go with him. I do enjoy being with David but I need to let him feel that.
Results:
I DID IT! I talked to David about fighting and I survived. We talked very civilly and talked about why I don't fight (my fear of confrontation). I even told David that I'm afraid of him. So, yea, task accomplished.
As far as yesterday's dare, as soon as I finished blogging I immediately went back to the bedroom and was just there with David. Normally I would have just sat at the computer and played games, not a very productive activity. David even asked what I was doing and I told him I wanted to be with him. It felt good. We were together absolutely all day.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Day 13 - Love Dare - Love fights fair
Dare:
Talk to David about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If David isn't ready for this, write out my own personal rules to "fight" by. Abide by these when the next disagreement occurs.
Okay, well, David will tell you that we never fight. And we don't in the normal sense of the word, but it doesn't mean that's healthy. We ignore conflict - or I should say - I ignore conflict. I've always said David doesn't fight fairly. I tried fighting with him once and David just turned things around and it was my fault and he was really mean about it. Maybe it was my fault - can't remember what the issue was - but my ego was damaged and I determined I just wasn't going to fight. Did that fix things? Not really. I hold my feelings inside and seeth and steam and eventually seem to get over it. I wish I could talk with David and let him know without it always being turned around to me.
So, maybe establishing "fight" rules might help me do that. I know it would be healthier for our marriage if we could get things out. I usually know how David feels but he doesn't know how I feel. Not healthy - and selfish on both our parts. I'm avoiding conflict and I'm good at that.
Result:
I just couldn't bring myself up to talking to David about fighting - avoiding it again. The one rule that I think I need for myself is to express my feelings. But I want to do it in a way that it doesn't set David off. You know, I'm afraid of him. He would never physically hurt me. But he can be very sharp tongued and I don't want that directed at me. That sharp tongue stings and my ego bruises very easily. Yet, I know it still isn't healthy for me to hold my feelings inside. I will try to talk to him about fighting again today. I need to do this.
Talk to David about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If David isn't ready for this, write out my own personal rules to "fight" by. Abide by these when the next disagreement occurs.
Okay, well, David will tell you that we never fight. And we don't in the normal sense of the word, but it doesn't mean that's healthy. We ignore conflict - or I should say - I ignore conflict. I've always said David doesn't fight fairly. I tried fighting with him once and David just turned things around and it was my fault and he was really mean about it. Maybe it was my fault - can't remember what the issue was - but my ego was damaged and I determined I just wasn't going to fight. Did that fix things? Not really. I hold my feelings inside and seeth and steam and eventually seem to get over it. I wish I could talk with David and let him know without it always being turned around to me.
So, maybe establishing "fight" rules might help me do that. I know it would be healthier for our marriage if we could get things out. I usually know how David feels but he doesn't know how I feel. Not healthy - and selfish on both our parts. I'm avoiding conflict and I'm good at that.
Result:
I just couldn't bring myself up to talking to David about fighting - avoiding it again. The one rule that I think I need for myself is to express my feelings. But I want to do it in a way that it doesn't set David off. You know, I'm afraid of him. He would never physically hurt me. But he can be very sharp tongued and I don't want that directed at me. That sharp tongue stings and my ego bruises very easily. Yet, I know it still isn't healthy for me to hold my feelings inside. I will try to talk to him about fighting again today. I need to do this.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Day 12 - Love Dare - Love Lets the Other Win
Dare:
Willingly choose to give into in an area of disagreement between David and me. Tell him I putting his preference first.
Okay, so I give in all the time. I often go places I don't want to go. BUT, the key word here is willingly. That's the part that's missing. I will look for the next opportunity to go with or do something for David that I would normally do grudgingly. I won't be thinking inside, I wish we weren't doing this, or I'd rather do this. I will think about the opportunity to be with my spouse doing something with/for him.
Result:
Well, I ended up with 1/2 day off. David always gets home around 10:30. David normally comes home and falls asleep, getting bored. When I'm home he wants to go places. NormallyI fudge because I get home so late. I knew David would want to go places. I just determined that we were going to be going places. It made it so much easier when we went out. We stopped at our friend's house then for a drive. Not my favorite activity, butI just thought of it as an opportuity to be with David. You know what, I wasn't irritated at the least. Also, since I know me commenting on David's driving irritates him, I worked on that too. It was a pleasant drive. I am already a happier person and enjoy being around David so much more, even though he hasn't changed one bit.
Willingly choose to give into in an area of disagreement between David and me. Tell him I putting his preference first.
Okay, so I give in all the time. I often go places I don't want to go. BUT, the key word here is willingly. That's the part that's missing. I will look for the next opportunity to go with or do something for David that I would normally do grudgingly. I won't be thinking inside, I wish we weren't doing this, or I'd rather do this. I will think about the opportunity to be with my spouse doing something with/for him.
Result:
Well, I ended up with 1/2 day off. David always gets home around 10:30. David normally comes home and falls asleep, getting bored. When I'm home he wants to go places. NormallyI fudge because I get home so late. I knew David would want to go places. I just determined that we were going to be going places. It made it so much easier when we went out. We stopped at our friend's house then for a drive. Not my favorite activity, butI just thought of it as an opportuity to be with David. You know what, I wasn't irritated at the least. Also, since I know me commenting on David's driving irritates him, I worked on that too. It was a pleasant drive. I am already a happier person and enjoy being around David so much more, even though he hasn't changed one bit.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Day 11 - Love Dare - Love Cherishes
Dare:
Do something for David that shows I cherish him - examples, massage or run an errand. Meet one of his needs.
David and I have always said we'd be married forever - divorce is never in the picture. But why? Is it because we don't believe in divorce or because we truly cherish each other? I haven't been so good at the cherishing thing. Time to change that.
David is big, I mean bbbbiiiggg. Have I let that diminish my feelings for him? He is still the same person I married, and he demonstrates that he loves me even though I'm also a big person. Although I do want him to lose weight for his health, I need to accept his whole being, including his body. He mentioned last night that he needs to lose weight. So do I. Maybe I can help him by joining him in a weight loss regimen.
Results:
I tried to take every opportunity I could to do things for David. I put his choir book away. I tried to get him what he needed. Unfortunately, he had a hard day. He is the AWANA commander and he's been praying for 200 clubbers this year. It started off great but has slowly diminished, mainly because he doesn't have all the help he needs. He was kind of grouchy and bit my head off once. I didn't react, didn't argue, nothing - even though it hurt. I told someone this morning that the dare isn't about changing David. It's about changing me. It's about my love for him. I can't control him. I can only control me.
Do something for David that shows I cherish him - examples, massage or run an errand. Meet one of his needs.
David and I have always said we'd be married forever - divorce is never in the picture. But why? Is it because we don't believe in divorce or because we truly cherish each other? I haven't been so good at the cherishing thing. Time to change that.
David is big, I mean bbbbiiiggg. Have I let that diminish my feelings for him? He is still the same person I married, and he demonstrates that he loves me even though I'm also a big person. Although I do want him to lose weight for his health, I need to accept his whole being, including his body. He mentioned last night that he needs to lose weight. So do I. Maybe I can help him by joining him in a weight loss regimen.
Results:
I tried to take every opportunity I could to do things for David. I put his choir book away. I tried to get him what he needed. Unfortunately, he had a hard day. He is the AWANA commander and he's been praying for 200 clubbers this year. It started off great but has slowly diminished, mainly because he doesn't have all the help he needs. He was kind of grouchy and bit my head off once. I didn't react, didn't argue, nothing - even though it hurt. I told someone this morning that the dare isn't about changing David. It's about changing me. It's about my love for him. I can't control him. I can only control me.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Day 10 - Love Dare - Love is Unconditional
Dare:
Find something to do for David that shows my love for him is based on choice and nothing else.
Wow, today's devotion was really telling. If someone had asked me why I love David I could have come up with all the pat answers. But those are all conditions. What if those conditions change - what if David is no longer kind? Would my love change? If so, my love is not unconditional. My answer for when people ask me why I love David is that he is my soul mate. That will never change. I will never fall out of love with him. If I did, that would also be conditional.
Not to find some act that shows him my love is based on choice.
Results:
Well, I did somethings that I know speaks love to David. It's very personal so I won't share that. It really doesn't matter, just that it showed love.
I wonder if David is noticing a difference in me. I feel like I'm changing. I'm not getting as irritated, even though nothing around me has changed. Is it noticable?
Find something to do for David that shows my love for him is based on choice and nothing else.
Wow, today's devotion was really telling. If someone had asked me why I love David I could have come up with all the pat answers. But those are all conditions. What if those conditions change - what if David is no longer kind? Would my love change? If so, my love is not unconditional. My answer for when people ask me why I love David is that he is my soul mate. That will never change. I will never fall out of love with him. If I did, that would also be conditional.
Not to find some act that shows him my love is based on choice.
Results:
Well, I did somethings that I know speaks love to David. It's very personal so I won't share that. It really doesn't matter, just that it showed love.
I wonder if David is noticing a difference in me. I feel like I'm changing. I'm not getting as irritated, even though nothing around me has changed. Is it noticable?
Monday, September 20, 2010
Day 9 - Love Dare - Love Makes Good Impressions
Dare:
Think of a specific way to greet David today with a smile and enthusiasm. Then determine to change my greeting to reflrect my love for him.
Okay, I won't be able to do this in person today because I am leaving on an overnight business trip. But I can call him. I'm not so great about calling when I'm on a trip, so I will make sure I do call him and tell him I miss him.
When he walks into a room, my heart really feels lifted. Why don't I tell him that? I am happy when he is near. Why don't I tell him that? I will determine to make sure he can hear my joy and enthusiasm in my voice today and onwards.
Results:
Even though I couldn't greet David in person, I did talk to him 3 times on the phone (I think that"s a record for me). Any way, eaach time I talked to him I tried to make my voice reflect how much I wanted to talk to him. I didn't have to force anything or fake anything. I really did want to talk to him. Now I can't wait to see him tomorrow.
Think of a specific way to greet David today with a smile and enthusiasm. Then determine to change my greeting to reflrect my love for him.
Okay, I won't be able to do this in person today because I am leaving on an overnight business trip. But I can call him. I'm not so great about calling when I'm on a trip, so I will make sure I do call him and tell him I miss him.
When he walks into a room, my heart really feels lifted. Why don't I tell him that? I am happy when he is near. Why don't I tell him that? I will determine to make sure he can hear my joy and enthusiasm in my voice today and onwards.
Results:
Even though I couldn't greet David in person, I did talk to him 3 times on the phone (I think that"s a record for me). Any way, eaach time I talked to him I tried to make my voice reflect how much I wanted to talk to him. I didn't have to force anything or fake anything. I really did want to talk to him. Now I can't wait to see him tomorrow.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Day 8 - Love Dare - Love is Not Jealous
Dare:
Become David's biggest fan and reject any thoughts of jealousy. Take yesterday's list of negative attributes and burn it. Share with David how glad i am aoub a succes he's recently enjoyed.
Okay, so this seems like something I can do. I think David is the best. Now I have to find opportunities to show it. Here's an opportunity here - in case anyone else reads this. My husband is the best, most loving man I know.
Become David's biggest fan and reject any thoughts of jealousy. Take yesterday's list of negative attributes and burn it. Share with David how glad i am aoub a succes he's recently enjoyed.
Okay, so this seems like something I can do. I think David is the best. Now I have to find opportunities to show it. Here's an opportunity here - in case anyone else reads this. My husband is the best, most loving man I know.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Day 7 - Love Dare - Love Believes the Best
Dare:
I'm to write out 2 lists. ONe with all the positive things about David and one with all the negative. They need to be on separate sheets and then put away for another day. In the meantime I'm to pick a positive attribute from the first list and thank David for having this characteristic.
David has so many positive characteristics that this part will be easy. They are also plenty of things about him that annoy me, but I have a hard time expressing them because it's mean. Does that mean they aren't really there to irritate me? No, they're there, I just don't voice them. So this one will be tough, and mean. These are the things that when I find myself thinking about them, I've gone to the depreciation room. So, I need to shut that door and only think of the positive things, and there are so many.
Also, still need to do all the things from the past days, including not being irritated. This is getting tough.
Results:
Okay, I made lists. The mean list was hard to do. I'm not telling you a thing that is on this list because they mean nothing. But the good list was much longer and made me feel better.
Still failing at not getting irritated. Had 4 extra kids over for the day (and over night). Hard not to be irritated and when I'm irritated, hard not to take it out on David. David ended up going to church to cook for our anniversary party. I ended up staying home because along with extra kids, I was not feeling so hot. So, David didn't end up having to listen to me complain. But, that is not the goal.
Man, I've got to try harder - well, maybe I need to stop trying and let God handle it.
I'm to write out 2 lists. ONe with all the positive things about David and one with all the negative. They need to be on separate sheets and then put away for another day. In the meantime I'm to pick a positive attribute from the first list and thank David for having this characteristic.
David has so many positive characteristics that this part will be easy. They are also plenty of things about him that annoy me, but I have a hard time expressing them because it's mean. Does that mean they aren't really there to irritate me? No, they're there, I just don't voice them. So this one will be tough, and mean. These are the things that when I find myself thinking about them, I've gone to the depreciation room. So, I need to shut that door and only think of the positive things, and there are so many.
Also, still need to do all the things from the past days, including not being irritated. This is getting tough.
Results:
Okay, I made lists. The mean list was hard to do. I'm not telling you a thing that is on this list because they mean nothing. But the good list was much longer and made me feel better.
Still failing at not getting irritated. Had 4 extra kids over for the day (and over night). Hard not to be irritated and when I'm irritated, hard not to take it out on David. David ended up going to church to cook for our anniversary party. I ended up staying home because along with extra kids, I was not feeling so hot. So, David didn't end up having to listen to me complain. But, that is not the goal.
Man, I've got to try harder - well, maybe I need to stop trying and let God handle it.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Day 6 - Love Dare - Love is Not Irritable
Update - after I posted my blog last night David asked me what 3 things about him irritated me. Wasn't quite sure how to handle that. I'm not going to tell you my answers because that's not what this is about, but it was really tough to come up with 3. 2 came to mind pretty easily, but the third - I kept thinking about things that irritate me, but they were tiny, silly things. I finally came up with something. I wanted to be honest because that's what I had asked of him, but I didn't want to hurt him - tough, tough, tough.
Dare: (this one is long)
Wow, okay, the timing on this is incredible. According to the authors one of the causes of irritability is stress. I was just telling David and some friends yesterday that I am feeling stressed and overwhelmed at work. DANGER, WILL ROBINSON, DANGER. I guess I am likely to let that translate into being really cranky. I'll have to really watch that.
The other source of irritability is selfishness, and boy, I definitely have that problem. I'm happy letting people take care of me while I do what I want to do. If someone makes me do something I don't want to do, I get cranky. I may still do it, but I am grumbling underneath.
Areas where I need to add margin to my schedule:
Dare: (this one is long)
- Choose to react today to tough circumstances in my marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation.
- Make a list of areas where I need to add margin to your schedule
- List any wrong motivations that I need to release from my life.
Wow, okay, the timing on this is incredible. According to the authors one of the causes of irritability is stress. I was just telling David and some friends yesterday that I am feeling stressed and overwhelmed at work. DANGER, WILL ROBINSON, DANGER. I guess I am likely to let that translate into being really cranky. I'll have to really watch that.
The other source of irritability is selfishness, and boy, I definitely have that problem. I'm happy letting people take care of me while I do what I want to do. If someone makes me do something I don't want to do, I get cranky. I may still do it, but I am grumbling underneath.
Areas where I need to add margin to my schedule:
- At work, take my breaks and lunch.
- At work, delegate some of my work - ask for help.
- At home, get off the computer and do housework and other tasks that need to be done so I don't feel rushed in the end.
- Go to bed at a decent hour.
Motivations I need to release:
- People need to take care of me (I can make food, I don't have to wait for David to make me something).
- I work more hours than everyone else in the house combined so I shouldn't have to do housework.
- I need to play on the computer to relax because work stresses me out.
- My feelings are more important than everyone elses.
- David always carries all the money and I have to ask him when I need any. He gets to buy things anytime he wants, I have to ask to buy things.
Guess I better get off the computer and get my housework done. We'll see how this day goes.
Results:
I knew today was going to be a test. Most of the day was fine. Since it was my day off, David did his usual getting home and needing to run errands and expecting me to go with him. I didn't say anything, just went. I have to say, it wasn't my choice of things to do and I had to keep remembering not to be irritated. It still happened because David would open the window and it was hot. Also, David driving with me in the car is the epitome of me being irritated. I still did fairly well though. Even though I didn't show it, I knew I was irritated.
Then we had a few hours of peace. Shawn and I worked on updating the operating system on my laptop. Shawn thought it would go faster if we hooked it straight up to the ethernet rather than have it download through the wireless router. It was still going to take 3 - 4 hours. When it was 90% done, David comes out of the bedroom and starts looking up stuff on the internet on the desktop computer. That almost stopped the download. Then it took forever for that last 10%. In David's defense, we didn't tell him that he almost derailed 3 1/2 hours worth of work. I could only wait while the thing was loading so I was playing on my iPhone while David surfed the web. When David was done, he turned around and said, "Are you going to stay up all night?" in his usual gruff tone. That was it, irritation hit at the full level. I count today as a failure - have to try it again.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Day 5 - Love is Not Rude
Dare:
Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you.
Wow. When I saw the title of today's dare I thought, I'm not rude. Then I read the devotion and, boy, I'm in trouble. Especially with the dare. According to the devotion, women usually have better manners, but they are rude in other ways. For example, we can be quarrelsome or pouting. Anything that makes us unpleasant to be around is rude. I think I already know what one of David's answers will be. Hey, but the dare doesn't say I have to change anything based on what he tells me, does it?
Results:
Well, I asked him and it wasn't as bad as I thought it might. Iwas right on what I thought he would say on one. I will stay true to the dare and just tell you what David said and not defend myself here either.
So, David picked me up from a meeting I had in the Hemet office. I asked him to tell me three things about me or my behavior that bothers him. Here's what he said:
1. I tell him how to drive - yes, I do that
2. When I stay up late and then complain about being tired the next day - yes, guilty
3. oh, oh, can't remember - or did I just block it out? I asked David again. I apparently expect things from David. His example was that if he makes himself something to eat, I expect him to make me something too - hmmm, interesting
Anyway, these are things I obviously need to work on, and I will do my best.
It is really tough to just sit there and listen to what I do without giving justifications for my behavior, but I did just sit there and listen.
Are these going to get tougher? We'll see.
Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you.
Wow. When I saw the title of today's dare I thought, I'm not rude. Then I read the devotion and, boy, I'm in trouble. Especially with the dare. According to the devotion, women usually have better manners, but they are rude in other ways. For example, we can be quarrelsome or pouting. Anything that makes us unpleasant to be around is rude. I think I already know what one of David's answers will be. Hey, but the dare doesn't say I have to change anything based on what he tells me, does it?
Results:
Well, I asked him and it wasn't as bad as I thought it might. Iwas right on what I thought he would say on one. I will stay true to the dare and just tell you what David said and not defend myself here either.
So, David picked me up from a meeting I had in the Hemet office. I asked him to tell me three things about me or my behavior that bothers him. Here's what he said:
1. I tell him how to drive - yes, I do that
2. When I stay up late and then complain about being tired the next day - yes, guilty
3. oh, oh, can't remember - or did I just block it out? I asked David again. I apparently expect things from David. His example was that if he makes himself something to eat, I expect him to make me something too - hmmm, interesting
Anyway, these are things I obviously need to work on, and I will do my best.
It is really tough to just sit there and listen to what I do without giving justifications for my behavior, but I did just sit there and listen.
Are these going to get tougher? We'll see.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Day 4 - Love Dare - Love is Thoughtful
Dare:
Contact David sometime during the day, just to ask how he is doing.
This is something David does occasionally and I do extremely rarely. This only takes a moment. I know when David calls me it makes me know he's thinking about me. I do think about David a lot but maybe not as I should.
As today's devotion discussed, I'm also guilty of being mad at David and not telling him why. I use the excuse that when I talk to him about why I'm mad, he turns it right around and blames me for whatever the problem is. Well, that doesn't solve anything. Maybe I need to work on that too.
Result:
Okay, this is getting kind of fun. I called David just tlo say hi. Even though I had things I could have discussed with him, I kept it to asking him how he was doing and letting him talk. The rest of the stuff waited until later - although I made sure to keep it positive. You know, I can hardly wait to find out what tomorrow is about.
Contact David sometime during the day, just to ask how he is doing.
This is something David does occasionally and I do extremely rarely. This only takes a moment. I know when David calls me it makes me know he's thinking about me. I do think about David a lot but maybe not as I should.
As today's devotion discussed, I'm also guilty of being mad at David and not telling him why. I use the excuse that when I talk to him about why I'm mad, he turns it right around and blames me for whatever the problem is. Well, that doesn't solve anything. Maybe I need to work on that too.
Result:
Okay, this is getting kind of fun. I called David just tlo say hi. Even though I had things I could have discussed with him, I kept it to asking him how he was doing and letting him talk. The rest of the stuff waited until later - although I made sure to keep it positive. You know, I can hardly wait to find out what tomorrow is about.
Monday, September 13, 2010
Day 3 - Love Dare - Love is not selfish
Dare:
Okay, today I'm to buy my spouse something that lets him know I was thinking of him.
That may be tough - I don't have an opportunity to get to a store. I may have to do this tomorrow when I go to Sacramento. I was thinking I would have to delay a day anyway because I will not see David tomorrow. I could still do something unselfish for David today. I'll keep my eyes and ears open.
Results:
Okay, I did add an extra day because I was in Sacramento all day. I found some Suduko puzzle books for David along with a DVD set of old religious movies with a card. He loves Suduko and old movies so I hope it means something to him. The card is really sappy, but expresses my sentiments. I'll write tomorrow what he says after he sees them (I just put them on a chair he uses in the bedroom to discover).
Okay, today I'm to buy my spouse something that lets him know I was thinking of him.
That may be tough - I don't have an opportunity to get to a store. I may have to do this tomorrow when I go to Sacramento. I was thinking I would have to delay a day anyway because I will not see David tomorrow. I could still do something unselfish for David today. I'll keep my eyes and ears open.
Results:
Okay, I did add an extra day because I was in Sacramento all day. I found some Suduko puzzle books for David along with a DVD set of old religious movies with a card. He loves Suduko and old movies so I hope it means something to him. The card is really sappy, but expresses my sentiments. I'll write tomorrow what he says after he sees them (I just put them on a chair he uses in the bedroom to discover).
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Day 2 - Love Dare - Love is Kind
Dare:
Again say nothing negative to your spouse but do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.
Again when I read this, I thought this described David, but this time, he is the one that is kind, at least mostly. He takes care of me. I'm honestly very lazy and just let him do things for me. David always says the only thing he expects from me is to do the laundry Well, I've washed and dried the clothes - but I haven't put them away. I'm not doing even what is expected of me. I need to step it up and do that and more. My excuse is that I work 10 hours a day - more than everyone else in the house combined. Okay, so I will actively look for at least one gesture, but if God puts more in my path, I'll try to take advantage of it.
Results:
I'm not sure if David even noticed me being kind, but I tried. I put ALL the laundry away for one. Also, since it's Sunday, after church it's Fantasy Football time. I set up my laptop so David could watch the scores. At one point, he moved the laptop and it came unplugged so after a while the computer shut down. I have to admit, I didn't show the most patience when David was so helpless. I kind of grunted, got up from what I was doing and came over and fixed it for him. I caught myself and didn't say anything, but I thought it. I count that as a failing moment. Anyway, I picked up from there and went on. We had an event at the church and David, as always, was in the kitchen helping. I went in and saw him working on wrapping spoons in napkins - standing up. I knew his back was hurting so I offered to take his place (not something I would normally do). So, there were places I succeeded and one I didn't, which is what I will dwell on. I need to be serious and take this dare to heart completely.
Again say nothing negative to your spouse but do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.
Again when I read this, I thought this described David, but this time, he is the one that is kind, at least mostly. He takes care of me. I'm honestly very lazy and just let him do things for me. David always says the only thing he expects from me is to do the laundry Well, I've washed and dried the clothes - but I haven't put them away. I'm not doing even what is expected of me. I need to step it up and do that and more. My excuse is that I work 10 hours a day - more than everyone else in the house combined. Okay, so I will actively look for at least one gesture, but if God puts more in my path, I'll try to take advantage of it.
Results:
I'm not sure if David even noticed me being kind, but I tried. I put ALL the laundry away for one. Also, since it's Sunday, after church it's Fantasy Football time. I set up my laptop so David could watch the scores. At one point, he moved the laptop and it came unplugged so after a while the computer shut down. I have to admit, I didn't show the most patience when David was so helpless. I kind of grunted, got up from what I was doing and came over and fixed it for him. I caught myself and didn't say anything, but I thought it. I count that as a failing moment. Anyway, I picked up from there and went on. We had an event at the church and David, as always, was in the kitchen helping. I went in and saw him working on wrapping spoons in napkins - standing up. I knew his back was hurting so I offered to take his place (not something I would normally do). So, there were places I succeeded and one I didn't, which is what I will dwell on. I need to be serious and take this dare to heart completely.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Day 1 - Love Dare - Love is Patient
Dare:
Resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse at all.
Ooh boy. I read this and think, this is written for David, not for me. I am the picture of patience. Then I think, well, gosh, no, I'm not. I just don't show my impatience as much. Impatience is there rumbling under the surface. Plus, if you asked David he would probably say I'm not patient at all, especially when he's driving. We're taking Cassidy on a picnic today, which means driving and me playing with Cassidy while David sleeps in a chair. Oh, even that sounded impatient and negative - I'll have to repent of that already. I'll write later on how the day went.
Results:
It was tough, especially while we were driving. I had to bite my tongue and try not to hold on to the car door really noticably (something that drives David crazy). I did take notice of just how kind David can be. And today, because he ended up standing for a long period of time he was in a lot of pain. Yet, I didn't notice him being really short tempered. Perhaps it was because I was less irratable with him. Who knows. day 2 tomorrow, What is ahead for us?
Resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse at all.
Ooh boy. I read this and think, this is written for David, not for me. I am the picture of patience. Then I think, well, gosh, no, I'm not. I just don't show my impatience as much. Impatience is there rumbling under the surface. Plus, if you asked David he would probably say I'm not patient at all, especially when he's driving. We're taking Cassidy on a picnic today, which means driving and me playing with Cassidy while David sleeps in a chair. Oh, even that sounded impatient and negative - I'll have to repent of that already. I'll write later on how the day went.
Results:
It was tough, especially while we were driving. I had to bite my tongue and try not to hold on to the car door really noticably (something that drives David crazy). I did take notice of just how kind David can be. And today, because he ended up standing for a long period of time he was in a lot of pain. Yet, I didn't notice him being really short tempered. Perhaps it was because I was less irratable with him. Who knows. day 2 tomorrow, What is ahead for us?
Friday, September 10, 2010
The Love Dare
I was sitting around today, living my life as normal and I heard from God. Now when I hear from God I know I'm in for some perfecting. It's gonna make me better, but it's gonna take some work. Anyway, this time God was telling me I need to do the 40-day Love Dare, you know the thing from the movie, Fireproof. I'll be journaling my 40-day adventure, so if you have any desire to find out how it's working, feel free to read on.
Let me give you some background and I am going to try to be honest throughout the challenge.
First off, let me tell you that my husband is the most Godly man I know. I know he truly loves me and most of the time he treats me like his queen.
So why am I a frustrated wife? Because I'm married to an old man. David has had health problems for years which have affected his strength and stamina. I want to be able to go places and have fun, but I want to be with my husband. He walks really slow and can't walk very far. He tires easily and is often in pain. If he stays up until 9, that's past his bedtime. Well, I am not ready to be a senior citizen.
When he is in pain, he doesn't have much patience, especially with family and even more especially with me. Sometimes it hurts. David's memory is also slipping. He remembers conversations that just didn't happen.
Yet, he is the man I love with all my heart and I don't always treat him that way. So, that's why God spoke to me. I need to love David the way he deserves.
Well, Love Dare, here we go. I start with Day 1 tomorrow. The concept behind this is that I read a short devotion every day with a dare to do something specific that demonstrates love to my spouse.
Let me give you some background and I am going to try to be honest throughout the challenge.
First off, let me tell you that my husband is the most Godly man I know. I know he truly loves me and most of the time he treats me like his queen.
So why am I a frustrated wife? Because I'm married to an old man. David has had health problems for years which have affected his strength and stamina. I want to be able to go places and have fun, but I want to be with my husband. He walks really slow and can't walk very far. He tires easily and is often in pain. If he stays up until 9, that's past his bedtime. Well, I am not ready to be a senior citizen.
When he is in pain, he doesn't have much patience, especially with family and even more especially with me. Sometimes it hurts. David's memory is also slipping. He remembers conversations that just didn't happen.
Yet, he is the man I love with all my heart and I don't always treat him that way. So, that's why God spoke to me. I need to love David the way he deserves.
Well, Love Dare, here we go. I start with Day 1 tomorrow. The concept behind this is that I read a short devotion every day with a dare to do something specific that demonstrates love to my spouse.
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